I can't say I've ever thought of sex while sitting in I-95 traffic -- which is often. Most of my thoughts while in traffic are not nearly so pleasant. I'm usually trying to figure out what moron ahead is causing this, or trying not pull my hair out or figuring out all the reasons why I shouldn't use the shoulder like so many other assholes whizzing by me.

And then I once again realize that would make me an AD (asshole driver) and that's not really what I want to be. Then I start thinking about where the cop is probably sitting up ahead, waiting for all those others to go by but decides I'm the one he'll stop. Then I think of all the excuses or clever things I'd say to get out of the ticket. And usually by this time, traffic starts to move again -- for a few feet at least.